32 Weeks

At 32 weeks, I'm feeling great. I look at myself in the mirror and see how big I am, but I don't feel it. Don't get me wrong, I am having a hard time tying my shoes, getting out of bed and just bending over in general, but it doesn't bother me. Not much anyways. There are times when I wish I could squeeze into a normal pair of jeans (elastic waistbands only go so far) but then I remember why I can't and I feel much better. I think back to when being pregnant seemed like a dream and there wasn't any sign of my lil' bean and I don't know how I coped. Whereas now, I can feel him move every time he decides to turn his head, or stretch his arms, and even when he hiccups. It's a feeling I never would give up. Well...I'd give it up to be able to hold him, which of course is undeniable in the end. So 8 more weeks and I'll be holding this little guy. Wow. It doesn't scare me but I know I'm going to miss being pregnant. There's something so special about carrying this lil' bean around that makes me want to stop time. Maybe it's knowing that as long as he's in his watery home, he's going to be as safe as he can ever be. That right now the outside world has no effect on him except through me, an you know that I wouldn't do anything to harm him. When I feel him squirm around it makes me happy in a way that nothing ever did, and I can only imagine (for now) what it's going to feel like holding such a special person. A person that I've never met but loved right from the start.

As for other news, the closet is done and being used so it's on to the bathroom. Paul & his dad have started ripping apart the upstairs bathroom and I can only hope it won't take too long to finish. It's being completely gutted and we're changing the layout so the plumbing and electrical are being updated. We're also knocking out the closet and making it part of the bathroom so it'll be a bit bigger than it was, yay!

And It's a good thing that I'm not helping with the bathroom in any way because I'm getting clumsier. I never was graceful but now that I'm carrying almost 30 pounds in front, I can't seem to keep hold of anything or judge distance. I bump into things a lot more and I'm dropping everything. It's not fair! And the cruelest part of it all... it's hard to bend over and pick up the stuff I'm always dropping.

Anyways, I've gotten one step closer to delivery but preregistering at my pre birth clinic appointment. It was nothing special, just filling out the hospital paperwork in advance, and with that came some more resourceful information. Where to find support groups, nutrition info and activities to do with your children etc.

Paul & I also went to see Clash of the Titans in 3D. What a waste of money. I enjoyed the movie itself but the 3D was pretty useless and lame. I suggest watching it in 2D instead. I think the whole 3D experience is really overrated. Of the movies I've seen, most don't even have a lot of that "coming at you" effect.
At 32 weeks, my lil' bean now weighs about 4 pounds which is close to the weight of a jicama. His length should be close to 19 inches and growing. His head is now proportionate to the rest of his body and his skull is made up of 6 bones joined together by a flexible material called sutures. This will allow his head to mould and fit through the birth canal. All of his 5 senses are functioning when he is awake, which should usually be about 10% of the time but it seems more like 20 or 30%. He's a mover and a shaker! And of course there's the pound a week I'll be gaining until my lil' bean decides it's time for mom & dad to meet him. He will only use half of that but it will make up a third of his total birth weight. Only 8 more weeks to go.

31 Weeks

This week was nonstop. I had something to do each day of the week and then to top if off, it was my turn to work Saturday! Monday was the viewing for Stan, which of course was very unpleasant. I didn't know Stan as well as most of the people there but I couldn't help but empathise with them. There was a slideshow playing that really made me think about how short his life was and how precious it all is. There was no epiphany but a grounded realization that the minor things in life aren't always important. That work doesn't always come first even though it pays the bills. That time spent with others will always be worth more than time spent alone. And even though I've always known this, I've never really done anything about it. I go about my usual routines and I'm guilty of letting the little things get to me. But not anymore (I hope!). I've got great people around me and my lil' bean on the way. All good reasons to let go. To enjoy the journey and no let the details get in the way.
As we all said our final goodbyes to Stan on Tuesday, I prayed for all those I'd lost over time. Never anyone as young as Stan but even 90 years seems too short when you think of the family and friends you'd leave behind. The grandkids or great-grandkids you'll never be able to spend time with. Even though life, weather it's been a short or long one, will always mean death, may they all rest in peace and watch over us from above.

Wednesday was our first official meeting with our doula Jody. We spent about 1.5 hrs discussing my pregnancy and everything I want out of it. My expectations, and what I want to avoid. We also reviewed my birth plan which went very well. I wasn't sure if I was expecting too much or if my requests went right along with the doula/midwife philosophy. As it turned out, Jody and I were on the same page.

Thursday was another visit to the midwives. The lil' bean is doing well, as am I. There was a little concern because my fundal height was measuring 34 weeks but nothing to be alarmed about. We'll see where things stand when I go back in 2 weeks. I remembered to bring my food log so the midwife & I went through 6 days of my eating habits. There was only a couple of things she mentioned. The first was that I needed to eat more veggies and less fruit. And I had to eat the right type of fruit. Apparently the grapes and bananas that I like eating so much have too much fructose and glucose in them. Go figure... I've never heard of fruit being bad for you? Anyways, the second thing she mentioned was that I need to drink less juice. Again with the sugar thing. She actually told me to drink coffee instead of juice...hmmm. Now I haven't been one of those people who have avoided coffee at all cost throughout the pregnancy. I still have a cup a day or maybe every other day. Instead, I've decided that water would be a better choice. So now between meals (I refuse to give up juice when I eat) I'm drinking water. And it's not like I wasn't drinking it before... but now I'm having more.

Friday was just a short jaunt to the bank before work. Paul & I wanted to reorganize our finances and I think we did a great job of it. As for the weekend, it was also busy. It started at 7am, with work. I was there from 9 - 1 which is only a half day but still tiring. I stopped at the library on my way home to return some things and pick up others. When I got home Paul was working on the closet. He had been working on it all day and was finishing it up. I would have loved to crash on the couch but I decided against it because I knew I'd get nothing done if I rested. So I collected my shopping bags and off to the Superstore I went. I got our grocery shopping done and bought a little pair of sneakers for the lil' bean. They're going to be part of his coming home outfit, if I ever get around to looking for one!

Sunday was a little slower but still busy. I did the laundry, which I had put off for 2 weeks, and in between I was cleaning upstairs. I got around to testing an infant carrier I borrowed from my sister and came to the conclusion that the car was going to have to be sold. The base fit OK but trying to get an empty carrier in the back was impossibly awkward. I couldn't step into the car while holding the carrier because the passenger seat doesn't move up far enough. Plus, when I tried to place the carrier in the cradle, there's barely enough clearance to get it into the back seat. It was horrible. So to add to my to do list, which I guess wasn't long enough, I now have to look for a new vehicle. But as of Sunday night, I now have a huge, finished downstairs closet. I just have to wait for the stain to dry before filling it!
Right now my lil' bean weighs in at about 3.5 pounds, about the weight of 4 navel oranges, and is roughly 18 inches long. He can turn his head from side to side and his brain is going through another rapid phase in development. He can now make out noises instead of just the vibrations and his eye sight is sharpening. He can track things with his eyes and the irises will respond to light as he blinks. The lungs and digestive track are almost mature and he is still building up that layer of fat and filling out. Only 9 more weeks to go...

30 Weeks

This week didn't start off well. Paul called me Monday night to tell me that his friend Stan had passed away. I couldn't believe it at first and thought that maybe he'd been in some sort of accident. It was even more tragic than that. Stan was only 34 and he died of heart failure. I don't know all the details but what I've heard is that he had been born with a genetic heart defect that was never detected. Apparently the walls of his heart were too thin and although he had been complaining of chest pains for a short while, the doctors never found anything wrong. The only thing they seemed to be concerned about was a slightly elevated cholesterol level. They told Stan to exercise a couple times a week, and he did. While he was playing squash with a friend, he collapsed and the paramedics spent about 20 minutes trying to revive him. I'm not sure when they pronounced him dead but he was taken to the hospital and his family was notified. Paul & a couple friends went over to see Sally, Stan's mom and to offer help with anything. She had her sister over but was thankful for the visit. I wanted to go with them but I couldn't. I had already made plans to get my gestational diabetes test done.

I had heard lots of things about this sugary drink but it was definitely not what I had expected. I thought it was going to be a shot of some super sweet orange syrup but it was more like half a can of sweetened orange crush. I drank it and had to sit in the waiting room for an hour before they could draw my blood. It was a little boring since Paul wasn't with me but I did bring a book to read. That only made me sleepy and I decided to close my eyes for a little. There weren't a lot of people coming in and out so I didn't feel to awkward sitting there with my eyes closed. After an hour, I wasn't feeling too good. All that sugar was making me a little queasy and it had left a bad aftertaste in my mouth. The nurse then called me in and she took my blood. It wasn't long before I was out the door and heading to Tim Hortons for a coffee and bagel. I felt much better after that.

Easter was coming up and I had promised my mom I would make a lasagna for lunch to accompany her roast beef. I thought I had everything I needed but when I started cooking friday night I realized that I didn't have enough pasta and could only make the meat. I got up early Saturday morning and quickly made my way to Giant Tiger. I never took any notice during the morning but, after cooking the lasagna I sat on the couch to rub my soar feet and was surprised to see that they looked like potatoes. Apparently my socks were making my feet swell and I started cursing them. I flung them across the room and tried to keep my feet elevated until we had to leave which was only for a half hour or so. They got a little better as the day went on but didn't go back to normal. It wasn't until the next morning that they deflated to their normal size. But ever since that I day I've been folding my socks down and that seems to help a lot. My feet still swell a little because I'm on them all day but they haven't been that bad since.

Well, even though it was Easter weekend, Paul & I picked up the crib. We'd had a difficult time agreeing on which one we liked and when we saw this one we knew it was the one. It's still in the box since we haven't cleared out a room for our lil' bean but at least we're one step closer. Unfortunately the dresser wasn't available so we're still waiting on it. And since I forgot to mention it before, you'll be happy to know I now have a baby registry. It was really a daunting task but we managed to pull through. Most of the stuff we need probably won't be purchased but at least we've been through it all and if push comes to shove, I can pick up the necessities knowing Paul won't be unhappy.

Easter Sunday was also baby oriented. My sister-in-law brought over the bassinet we're borrowing and it's great. At least if we don't get the nursery done in time our lil' bean will have someplace to sleep. The other thing that happened that day was me being able to see my shower invitations. They are too cool. I decided on "monsters" as my theme and my sister-in-law came up with such a great design. They are felt monsters, sewn together with a flat stuffing to make them sort of soft. The actual invite will be placed on top of the felt monster. They are so adorable.

At 30 weeks my lil' bean is weighing in at about 3lbs. roughly the size of a cabbage. There is about a pint and a half of amniotic fluid surrounding him, which will decrease in volume as he gets bigger. The soft lanugo hair that was protecting the skin is now starting to fall off. He is keeping active by moving around and this can be seen and felt. He is also practicing his breathing movements by moving his diaphragm which could lead to hiccups.