9 to 5

I had an older friend who once told me that she and her husband had agreed to not have children if it wasn't possible for her to be a stay at home mom.  They both came from large families so there were always plenty of nieces and nephews to love as their own.  And this worked for them.

As for me, I don't think I could have made that decision.  To chose between having or not having children based on who was caring for them during the day would have broken my heart.  I would have loved it if I could stay home but I know Paul and I would be better able to provide for them if I went back to work.  So Monday was my first day back.

Let's face it, even if you live on the bare necessities, it still costs a lot to keep food on the table and a roof over your head.  Then toss in some children and it becomes a whole new ball game.  Although daycare is't free, most families would agree that it still makes more financial sense for both parents to work.

Of course it's not all about money.  There's the social aspect of it.  Pauly loves playing with other kids and now has another little boy his own age to play with every day.  Riley was a little more timid and very attached to me and has adapted surprisingly well over the last two weeks.  She has definitely come out of her shell.

Then there's routine, which wasn't always the case while I was home.  Snack time, lunch and naps were pretty much on schedule, but there were days where I had too much to catch up on so the outings and fun activities were almost non-existent.  At daycare there's always a theme and corresponding activities, indoors and out.

So as the days go by I'm left reminiscing.  No more afternoon naps (when I got a chance), no more lounging in PJ's on rainy days and no more walks in the park on sunny afternoons.

Epilogue

I wanted my next post to be about Riley's 1st birthday but since I haven't gotten around to downloading pictures off my camera, I'm going to share some great news I got early last week. NO...I'm not pregnant.

 I thought October 9th would be my first day back at work. I was mentally preparing for it but as it turns out, that day will come later rather than sooner. Yay! And you may be wondering how I managed more time off but it really wasn't me. Not entirely anyways. I knew I had 3 weeks of vacation left once I went back to work. I was planning on taking some of it during Christmas but I was told this wasn't going to happen as all the available spots had been taken. That left me with two options.
1. Keep my vacation for emergencies and take the payout if I didn't use it by the end of the year. Or,
2. Tack it onto the end of my maternity leave.

 As I've said before, sometimes money isn't worth more than time. Luckily I now get to have my cake and eat it too. An extra 3 week at home with my babies, and a full paycheck.

 So now my official first day of work will be October 29th. I can hope and pray there will be another excuse for me to stay home longer but, I won't be holding my breath.

The Final Chapter

As Canadians, we are lucky to be able to spend the first year of our children's lives as a stay at home parent. Of course our unemployment benefits could always use some improvement but often, time is worth more than money. So as Riley's first birthday approaches, my time as a stay at home mom is coming to an end. And what a journey's it's been.

Over the last two years my life has changed so much. With two children you really learn to slow down and enjoy the moment. Even simple tasks like washing dishes may not get done all at once. With one child pulling at your legs and the other asking you to help build his train track, chores are no longer the priority. Somewhere along the road of life your focus shifts from doing things that make you happy to what "needs" to be done. Albeit not everything in life is miserable but when was the last time you pulled out a box of crayons and just scribbled? My kids love to get messy with crayons, paint, food and dirt and as long as they're safe doing it, why not?

So as my last few weeks of maternity leave are approaching, I'm sad to think that I won't be here for them all day, every day. I will have to take on the roll of a working mom like so many others have done. Daycare will be a new chapter for our family, and although I'm completely happy with the home daycare we chose, I have to admit that it makes me a little weepy. Mornings together will be short and the little time I have before putting my children to bed will be cherished. The days of working volentary overtime are over. No one can pay me enough to give that up.

Potty Training

About 3 weeks after Pauly turned two I decided it was time for me to give potty training a try. I had read up on it a little and was quite confident that the little man was ready. I only had doubts about myself.

It would be a new experience for the both of us but I wanted to be sure I wouldn't set the little guy up for failure. I decided to ditch the pull ups (for now) and go straight for the briefs. So here's how it went:

DAY ONE - Put on his undies with an excited voice explaining he was a big boy now and we'd be ditching the diapers. I made sure to buy ones that had prints on them so he would want to wear them. Success! And he wore nothing else that day so he could actually see and feel what was going on. Then every 5-10 minutes I tried to convince him to sit on either the little potty, or on the big potty which had a child seat on it. He would happily come with me most of the time, and we did get a few "catches" but I spent the majority of the day cleaning up after him. Which was OK because I had placed towels over every rug in the house in anticipation. When it was nap time I wrestled with the idea of a diaper but decided against it. For me it was all or nothing. I just ended up placing a towel under him for easy clean up.

DAY TWO - Exactly like day one with a little tweak. I thought I'd add a treat every time Pauly got on the potty, in hopes that he'd start asking to go. So if we got to the potty without any hesitation, he got one Reese's Pieces for trying. If we got a pee in the potty, he got two Reese's Pieces. If we got a poo in the potty, he got three Reese's Pieces.

DAY THREE - Surprisingly there were only half as many accidents. I was still asking Pauly if he had to go every 20 minutes or so but it was sooooo much easier than the day before.

DAY FOUR - There was only 2 or 3 accidents this day. I really couldn't believe how well this was going. And now Pauly was asking to use the potty. It just seemed to good to be true.

DAY FIVE - I figured Pauly was now ready for pants. So he was fully dressed 5 days into his training. I had to work a little quicker to get him to the potty on time but there was no doubt he was getting the hang of things. I decided it was time to go for a ride. So I took a 30 minute car ride to my mom's, hoping he would arrive without incident. Success again!

DAY SIX - Fully dressed and making great progress, Pauly seemed to be having no problem with peeing in the potty. But we had hit a bump in the road. His only struggle was having a bowel movement. He would only have one every 2 or 3 days, which made things a little difficult when the time finally arrived. I knew I had to act quickly because the last thing I wanted for him was to be in pain when he pooped.

So a couple days later, after seeking some advice, I started giving Pauly a small amount of stool softener. It worked wonders. In the begining he was still only going every other day but it was no longer difficult. As time went by, he got more comfortable with pooping and stopped holding it in.

Now (2 months later), Pauly is officially day time potty trained. I no longer have to use a stool softener and he is asking to go #1 and #2. Nap time is always dry and there aren't any wet pants after a car ride. Next up - night time training.

Losing IT

Pregnancy is usually the time in your life where you look forward to seeing your belly get bigger.  I can remember when I first found out I was pregnant with Pauly, the excitment and joy took over.  And with that came the frequent checking to see if I was "showing" yet.  As the weeks and months passed, my bump got bigger...and so did everything else.

Shopping for maternity clothes was fun. And as always, there were those few pieces that I loved wearing. Then at about 30 weeks things got a little complicated. My favourite pair of jeans started getting a little too snug around the hips and thighs. Shirts were now too short and I had to start buying bras in specialty shops.  I really thought the clothes I bought at the beginning would get me through to the end.  So, reluctantly I headed back out to buy enough clothes to last me 10 more weeks.

After Pauly was born I lost some weight. Then after about a month I gained some of it back.  It was only a few pounds but of course I could only blame myself.  I choose napping for an hour over preparing a meal. So I found myself eating caned and boxed food most of the time.  Not to mention the shamefully frequent junk food binge.  I think Pauly was about 4 months old when I decided I'd had enough.  I slowly stared using the elliptical and started cutting out the junk food. It took a while before the first few pounds came off but I was headed in the right direction.

When Paul and I decided to have another baby, I kinda gave up on the elliptical. It all happened way sooner than we thought but before I knew it, my baby bump (and the weight) were back. I can proudly say that I didn't gain as much weight while pregnant with Riley. But since I had started out bigger, I was exactly where I'd left off when Riley was born.

There was a period of adjustment for me. Caring for two children was a lot different than just one. But after that, I was back into my old routine of quick fixes for food. As the new year came and went I tried to find ways to exercise but there was just no time or I was just too tired. It was a vicious circle; the extra weight was making me lazy but I had no energy to do anything about it.

Once the warm wether showed up I'd had enough (again!). Riley was finally sleeping through the night and I was feeling a little more like myself. I wanted out of this rut and had made up my mind to just get moving. The best time for me was after breakfast. The kids were happy and I had energy to waste. Instead of cleaning up the breakfast dishes and toys that had been tossed around the house that morning, I stuck the kids in the double stroller and started walking.

This wasn't an every day routine but I had to start somewhere. It felt good to get out but at the same time I knew it wasn't going to be enough. I found myself constantly thinking about my health, and life in general. It's not that I was unhappy, but I just wanted to get as much out of life that I could. This was when I adopted the Carpe Diem philosophy.

So I set some goals and reevaluated my eating and activity habits. I started looking for ways to cut fat and refined sugar from my diet. Then I came across an app that I can no longer live without. My Fitness Pal has really helped me make better food choices and keep my portion sizes in check. It took some getting used to and I still have a long way to go but, I think I'm doing well. I still indulge in the sweet and savory every now and again but not like I used to.

It's been 5 weeks using My Fitness Pal, and 2 months since I started my "lifestyle change" and you're probably wondering exactly how well I'm doing. I'm very happy to announce (insert drum roll here) I've lost 10 lbs. A small step but at least I'm getting there, slowly and steadily. My ultimate goal is to be back to my prepregnancy weight by next summer or sooner. And now that I've put it to (cyber) paper, I'll hopefully stick with it.